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I'm totally indulging in a mid-afternoon glass of wine and cheesy chick-flick, "Little Black Book"

Ok, I'm better. A day, some sleep, a good chunk of time at the gym and a glass of wine and I think I'm a little better. It helps that the scale at the gym confirmed what my home scale said and what my clothes have begun to show - I'm down five pounds! - and that I worked out some stress on the circuit and then got in a good, long walk on the treadmill, during which I read an entire magazine from cover to cover. An ENTIRE magazine! I never get to do that! I'm looking forward to a fun bath with Sammy when he wakes from his nap and some comfort food for dinner and if I can stay awake long enough, maybe a movie with Jay. And I've picked up a book again - You Shall Know Our Velocity by Dave Eggers, which is pretty good so far. Less CNN, less news that makes me cry, more relaxing, more playing, more reading, more movies. It could work, right?

I know I'm just overwhelmed, and it's stupid, because when I make a list and break things down, I know that everything's totally manageable. I just hate when I feel distracted during playtime with Sammy, you know? I had a good, centered period of time there, and now I'm all out of whack again. Ugh.

I think I just need to make that list, check things off - and be done with this semester already. It just frustrates me to see kids I know are capable just totally slack off and risk not graduating. My goal today, though? Playing with Sammy, snuggling on the couch with Jay and giving myself permission to let go of everything and just relax. It'll all be there in the morning anyway, right?

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Comments (4)

You Shall Know Our Velocity is amazing!

Posted by Suz | November 10, 2007 8:05 PM

I applaud your ability to do the work you do, and whether or not they show it, I know for certain you're getting through to them. The fact that you can tell them off and still be you, and that they notice that, is something that will stick with each of them. Maybe when they're in the real world and don't have all the answers anymore, and they're having a crap-tacular day and want to go off on someone, they'll remember you TRYING to tell them off and they'll smile. You've spread positive energy instead of negative, and that gets passed on...even if, when dealing with teenagers, there's no telling when that'll happen. :)

Snuggling Sammy sounds like a grand idea. I'm still not able to get the lump out of my throat, ever since Sara (8 months in several days) started holding her arms up and out when she wants to be held or picked up. Melts.my.heart!

Posted by Shannon | November 11, 2007 1:05 AM

I have to make myself lists all the time otherwise things just don't get done. I would love to just sit back and have a glass of wine with a cheesy chick flick anyday. Enjoy it, you deserve it!

Posted by Erin | November 11, 2007 10:09 AM

It's funny, but one of the biggest things that I've learned since becoming a mom, is how to be a bit selfish. When it was just me, it was much more acceptable (in my mind anyhow) to completely deplete my resources (emotional, physical, mental). Now I reserve myself so that I can be the best mom I can for Tabby. I say no way more often and I'm working really hard on not feeling guilty about that. People can come to me. Screw cleaning up the dirty house. And I cannot make my miserable mother in law happy by agreeing to let her ruin the first vacation I've had in 7 months.

Oh yea, my point. Good for you for taking care of yourself. You deserve it. Sammy & Jay deserve it. Hang in there. The to-do list WILL wait.

Posted by jesser | November 13, 2007 12:22 AM
 

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